Welp. We can successfully add endometriosis to our ever growing list of diagnoses. :-/ According to my Dr he took off 'almost the whole left side of the uterus'. He also took other bits out. Insanity. Pathology reports came back verifying what we already knew. I'm relieved in a way. Thank heaven they found it. It wasn't all in my head! However my dr is a believer in birth-control to control it. While I'm not thrilled about it I'm willing to give it a shot... for now. Anything to not be in pain, right? :-)
I'm anxiously waiting on pins and needles to find out how minimal the pain is when AF shows up. :-)
TMI ALERT.
REALLY.
IF YOU KNOW ME IRL YOU MAY NOT WANT TO READ.
Sex doesn't hurt!!! For the first time in.. I don't know how long it didn't hurt!!! Yeeeah I didn't wait until after my post op appt to get busy with hubs. Couldn't help it. Haha I did wait 2 wks though. And might I say it's been AWESOME!! Haha. I've been harassing LTL a ton. I'm sure he doesn't mind. He always seemed concerned about my pain. Now he can't get me to stop grabbing at him. Haha. I love it!
TMI OVER!!
So I think things are starting to look up for us. And that is WONDERFUL.
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Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Oh yeah..one more thing..
Had the lap... Survived... Found and removed endo... Should get all the nitty gritty info on Tuesday. Woot.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Confession
I don't think I ever really wanted to be preg. I think at one point I merely viewed it as a means to an end. It was only a way for me to get my family.
I never had that desire to birth a child. I never had dreams of being pregnant. Only those in which a toddler was running and playing. In my teens/early 20s I did all those things I knew I shouldn't. I partied hard and rebelled with the best of them. When I got the tattoo on my hip I remember being asked what I'd do when I got pregnant. I just laughed and asked why in the world they thought I'd ever be pregnant.
It makes me wonder if deep down I always knew my path would be adoption.
I remember talking to LTL before we got married. We talked about kids. I warned him of my family history of having trouble getting/staying preg. His response came quicker than expected. 'we'll adopt'. I fell more in love with him that night. He was willing to accept me. Faults and all.
I started this post yesterday morning as thoughts were trickling in. Never hit publish as I felt it was lacking but oh well. There it is. It's been a while since I blogged.
We're no more closer to finishing paperwork than we were before. I feel like I'm pulling teeth with LTL. There are things I can't do for him and he's just not doing them. I don't want to nag. He's busy with work and school but I'm starting to feel like I should give up hope. Just accept that we can't have biological children and stop trying to move forward with adoption. I can't do this on my own and I'm getting depressed at his lack of help/enthusiasm. I constantly wonder if he's having second thoughts. If he really wants to adopt. I don't dare ask him. Again. This week has been weird. I can't wait for next week. It'll be tons better.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
I never had that desire to birth a child. I never had dreams of being pregnant. Only those in which a toddler was running and playing. In my teens/early 20s I did all those things I knew I shouldn't. I partied hard and rebelled with the best of them. When I got the tattoo on my hip I remember being asked what I'd do when I got pregnant. I just laughed and asked why in the world they thought I'd ever be pregnant.
It makes me wonder if deep down I always knew my path would be adoption.
I remember talking to LTL before we got married. We talked about kids. I warned him of my family history of having trouble getting/staying preg. His response came quicker than expected. 'we'll adopt'. I fell more in love with him that night. He was willing to accept me. Faults and all.
I started this post yesterday morning as thoughts were trickling in. Never hit publish as I felt it was lacking but oh well. There it is. It's been a while since I blogged.
We're no more closer to finishing paperwork than we were before. I feel like I'm pulling teeth with LTL. There are things I can't do for him and he's just not doing them. I don't want to nag. He's busy with work and school but I'm starting to feel like I should give up hope. Just accept that we can't have biological children and stop trying to move forward with adoption. I can't do this on my own and I'm getting depressed at his lack of help/enthusiasm. I constantly wonder if he's having second thoughts. If he really wants to adopt. I don't dare ask him. Again. This week has been weird. I can't wait for next week. It'll be tons better.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
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