Hello there

Sorry, I've been MIA for a while. Still reading others blogs but seriously neglecting my own. (and seriously sucking at commenting) Just haven't felt like I have anything of value to say but I think I'll try. Bear with me as I update? Haha.
Things feel stagnant in my life. We got accepted as clients and are trying really hard to dive into the paperwork but between our work schedules and me getting pretty sick last week not much has happened. I've been able to take care of a couple things but I'm finding it hard to get my butt to our RE to have him sign our IF paperwork. Which I'll admit I'm not stoked on needing to do seeing as I'm not feeling like reliving all that crap. :-/ But. Our agency requires it.
Work has been great. Still loving being away from the salon scene. I got to go to California for some training so LTL came along. It was a nice little escape. I just wish it were longer so we're trying to make some vacation plans this summer. Nothing major. Just a couple little getaways. We need it.
I got a random call last night from my MIL. Why she calls me instead of her son I'm not sure. Haha. But oh well. She called to let me know that a semi distant family member was probably going to have their 18 month old little boy taken away. I'm not sure whats happening to mom but dad is getting incarcerated. They've had their other 2 kids taken away. So here's really why she called.. The grandmother (that we also all call Grandma 'W') wants to know if we would be interested in talking to the lawyer involved. I'm not sure if it would be a foster with intent to adopt or a straight forward private adoption. I think child welfare services (DCFS) is involved. So I'm torn. LTL says he's fine with anything but is just concerned because he knows I want an infant. Which I have said I wanted but I almost think this could be awesome. We'd be able to help this little one and keep him in fairly close contact with those that already love and adore him while allowing us to be parents. Last night I told LTL that I didn't think I was being rational as my MIL told me that if we didn't say yes she'd ask 'the other couple' and that hurt. For lots of reasons. Sometimes I feel like her trying to help is only self serving. SHE wants to be a grandma and that's all that matters. I get it. Kinda. But I wish I felt like she was doing these type of things in OUR best interest and in the best interest of this child.
So here are my thoughts now that almost 12 hours have passed.
*I want to email our social worker and discuss the potential 'repercussions' with the agency of us fostering this child (assuming that is what it is and we don't get to adopt him). I know if we were allowed to adopt him they'd close out our info and everything. (She told us that when we met.)
*I want to talk to Grandma W and see what the situation is.
*A chat with the lawyer would be grand to get an overall idea of how this would/could work.
*We'd need to call our insurance company and see if they'd cover him under the different circumstances.
*A chat with DCFS if possible to get a better understanding of what little dude has been through and what to expect with his mental health. (assuming they've done an evaluation) I don't want this to be traumatic for him and if we got to adopt him I want to be prepared to help him as much as possible.
*As much as I want to be a mom I'm worried that I'd say yes for the wrong reasons. I don't like thinking that my 'wants' could get in the way of whats really best for a child.
Annnd now that I've said/typed all this I'm even more confused as to what we should do. It's going to be a LONG Tuesday.